Inheriting the goose who laid the golden egg
Diablo 3 as an overblown comeback tour
Miraculously, the only informative D3 thread I've ever seen not get deleted:
Belial and Azmodan fanfic alternate plot blows Blizzard's writing out of the water - an example of what might have been
An article about a forum slip-up by a Blizzard employee; said thread has since been deleted (predictably)
(If Diablo III is Signs, then Kormac the Templar has to be Mel Gibson, the pious dullard whose faith is stretched to the limits when he reads something for the first time in gods know how long. Amazingly, Bashiok still seems to have a job after that.)
A wonderful review that highlights some of the atmosphere and storytelling failings of Diablo III brilliantly and concisely (on a tip from the forum, not deleted yet).
Because I don't trust Blizzard to safeguard fucking anything of value ever, I'm going to copy the Chthulboohoo's amazing OP (the Belial and Azmodan plot pitch) into comments now.
ReplyDelete(Verbatim, quote 1 from Cthulhuboohoo minus formatting)
ReplyDeleteOkay, first, I think this game is a total blast. I love it playing it, and I don't agree with the haters.
That said: there's some major story fail here. Spoilers abound ahead. Blizzard writers - I know you probably can't change these things at this point, but you REALLY should. And I would love you forever if you do. You don't have to take my solutions. But seriously, anything would be better than what you did.
This is long, but here are my problems with this section of the story. And how I would fix them. I hope some of you will take the time to read this. I think I have some solutions that both greatly improve the story and are more familiar in tone to the previous games.
The portrayal of Belial and Azmodan:
One thing that the previous Diablo games never failed to do was to make our major enemies intimidating as all hell. You run into the Butcher or Andarial for the first time, and you crap your pants. To say nothing of actually meeting Mephisto. And Baal. And DIABLO.
Belial and Azmodan fail to be memorable villains, despite fun boss fight mechanics and design because they don't live up to the character traits the writers gave them. Belial is the Lord of Lies, but he fails utterly at lying. Azmodan is a master strategist who makes every cartoon villain mistake. What? You had awesome character concepts that you just didn't use. These are the Evils that united to defeat the PRIME EVILS. They should be bad dudes.
Belial:
Well Belial is the Lord of Lies. So shouldn't he, you know, actually be remotely good at lying? His identity is so transparent that even your character is just like, "dude, you're not fooling ANYONE." He should be the most devious bastard in the franchise history. How can I take the physical embodiment of lies seriously when he couldn't fool a child? His fundamental problem is that it takes the player almost no effort to deduce that the child using supernatural powers is the greater demon himself. The Lord of Lies biggest lie is that he's a good liar. Wait, that was a pretty good lie...
My Fix:
Everything is the same till you get to face Belial. You approach the Child Emperor, and he morphs into Belial. Just as you suspected. You expected more from a greater demon. You're geared for your climatic boss fight. Belial cackles at you and gloats that the city has been his all along. His minions uncloak all around you and swarm to attack you - you were geared for a boss fight, but now you're fighting a dangerous mob as well. Undeterred, you charge through his minions, and with all your strength bring your axe down on Belial's laughing face.
To your surprise, his body crumples instantly - that was the easiest Lord of Hell you've ever fought. You feel victorious for only a second - even before his body hits the ground, you know there's something wrong. And Belial's form slowly reverts back to that of the child emperor. It was an illusion, and you killed a kid - His guards that you killed - people too. They must have seen you as the same demon you thought they were. An astral projection of Belial appears, laughing with glee. "Sorry, you just missed me. If you'd like to pay a call, please look me up at Mount Ariat. Ask for the Lord of Lies." And laughs and laughs and laughs. Yeah. You're stunned. And ANGRY.
The Iron Wolves burst in and see the carnage you've wrought. The charge you, and you are given the option of slaughtering your fellow humans - ones that helped you just a quest ago - or running from the city in shame and defeat. Act II, done. But you don't feel victorious. No climatic boss battle. You've killed a kid. And innocent humans. You did the job of a demon for him. Vengeance will be yours.
And this game just got more personal than ever before.
Wall of Text Break. Azmodan's problems and fix will appear in the next post. Feedback is appreciated.
The Problem with Azmodan:
ReplyDeleteWell all the lore Blizzard provides builds him up as this master strategist. Sun Tzu in a gluttonous, lecherous, wrathful, jealous, prideful demon form.
But I seem to remember Sun Tzu and all other great strategists generally advising you to ... well not just tell your enemy all your plans. Sure, as the embodiment of all sin, he should be prideful, but his gloating was just stupid: "I'm attacking exactly here, in this way. There's no way at all you could possibly stop me. My victory is assured. Please do not go and stop me from doing exactly what I was telling you I was going to do." Yeah, great strategy there. It's not even like a mistake he makes once. It's a mistake he makes ... like once every two minutes.
Before we get to Azmodan's fix, ee need to address the continuity issues brought on by my alterations to previous act. Just throw in a blurb about how the player arrives at Mt. Ariat expecting to find Belial, but instead finds the forces of Azmodan. Damn it. Lied to by the Lord of Lies again. He got me angry and used me as a pawn in his own demon civil war. The magnificent bastard.
The Fix:
Everything is the same, until you reach the final Sin Heart or whatever it is. And then Belial appears and tells you that Azmodan has played you for a fool, sent you on a wild goose chase; while you were running around in Hell, Azmodan himself stormed the Fortress. And it's fubared. And he's about to kill Leah / your companions / whoever else you care about. Well crap. Turns out he wasn't so bad at this strategy thing afterall. And he's inches away from the Black Soulstone.
You town portal back to find that Azmodan is indeed WRECKING town. And normal boss battle ensues, except in the awesome new setting of the totally ruined Act III town. And just when you're about to kill Azmodan, Belial appears, and lands the finishing blow on Azmodan from behind. Hell, Belial rips off his freaking head. And then you have to kill Belial. Double boss battle.
BAM. EPIC CLIMAX. The Civil War Story now had a purpose. Belial and Azmodan are both competent and totally badass. Monumental improvements all around.
I swear, who writes these things?
Edit: adjusted because upon reflection and advice, I realized my ending got a tad away from me. Anyways, this is something I came up with in twenty minutes and wrote down as a stream of consciousness. It could definitely be improved upon, and I'm open to criticism.
I just wanted to make Belial and Azmodan feel SCARY again.
Spoz: Not gonna happen. But it would have been better, had it happened that way.
DeleteBonnett: Kinda sad that someone randomly on to forums can think up a better plot in half an hour than an entire team of devs did for god knows how many months/years.
Changeable: I liked the Belial plot so much in particular, that I actually logged in to post for the first time ever.
Bravo
Cowboy: I enjoyed it up until the last minute or so. The whole invincibility and the Azmo gets back up, etc. That part was meh, but the rest was good.
DeleteCthulhuboohoo: (reply to Cowboy) Whatever. I put it together in 20 minutes. Probably needs some refinement. I'm open to criticism.
DeleteThe biggest thing is making them actually like ... Memorable. And scary. And not just totally totally incompetent.