1. Dick Van Dyke
He's been alive this whole time! Seriously!
2. Jimmy Carter
Hard to believe!
3. Betty White
Wait, is that a baby lemur?
4. Lynda Carter
I was going to put her on the other list, but no! She's been alive the whole time!
5. Jonathan Taylor Thomas
He may have taken the blue pill, but he's still alive!
6. Ruth Bader Ginsburg
The notorious RBG survived 2016. 4 more years left to go.
7. Morgan Freeman
He's getting up there. You'd think this would be low-hanging fruit for 2016.
8. James Earl Jones
I thought he died right after Lion King. I was going to put him on the other list. Nope!
9. Joyce Carol Oates
Still alive! Unbelievable.
10. Hallie Eisenberg
Remember the time Pepsi Girl died tragically in 2003? Me neither!
11. MacCaulay Culkin
Ok, you already knew he was still alive because of Saved, probably. You would've been kind of sad though right?
12. Jaleel White
Alive and looking better than ever. He's all like, "Survive 2016 - did I do that?"
13. Paul McCartney
His singing voice went to crap decades ago, but he's a good guy, and by all measures, 2016 should have killed him.
14. Chico
This bastard is 16 years old. In dog years, he's basically an archlich. Mancha, only 14 years old, also made it.
15. Bernie Sanders
Hell yeah!
16. and 17. Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen
2016 couldn't take down either of these old guys no matter how much Millenials adore them? Pathetic!
18. Malala Yousafzai
Survived a bullet. Survived 2016.
19. Rick Moranis
More like "Honey, I had to shrink my acting commitments to raise kids by myself after you died," amirite?
20. Mel Brooks
Alive, but not getting any younger, Mel Brooks needs to stop dragging his feet on that Spaceballs sequel. Maybe guilt Rick Moranis into getting into the studio sooner rather than later.
21. John Williams
Hiding in plain sight! His new riffs just aren't as catchy as his old stuff I guess.
22. Julie Andrews
Also alive. I had no idea.
23. "Sully" Sullenberger
Landed a plane in the freaking ocean and no one died. 2016 couldn't bring him down, either.
24. Stephen Hawking
Close, but no cigar. Points for trying, 2016.
25. Whoopi Goldberg
Whoopi Goldberg hasn't even missed a beat, let alone died.
26. Haley Joel Osment
Off the radar but not dead, this kid saw all the dead people of 2016.
27. Kathy Bates
Hello. My name is Kathy Bates, and I'm doing fine, thank you.
28. Buzz Aldrin
The shirt says it all.
29. Elizabeth Warren
These banks aren't going to regulate themselves, clearly.
30. John Shelby Spong
I don't often have genuine respect for religious points of view, but when I do, it's usually coming from an Episcopal.
31. Jonathan Goldsmith
The Most Interesting Man In The World may have been retired from his role in 2016, but not from the mortal coil.
32. Grumpy Cat
Make it so, Grumpy Cat.
33. Ringo Starr
Ringo Starr survived 2016 too, not that anyone cares. I'm just padding the list, I guess. He's shown above looking like he's auditioning for U2 or something.
34. and 35. Herbie Hancock and Wayne Shorter
These contemporaries of Coltrane and Davis are still here and still playing. But Wayne is noodling around with Free Jazz a little too much these days.
36. Carole King
It's not Too Late, Baby, to hear Carole King in concert, so you really should try to make it.
37. Mancha
You're an old dog, Mancha, but not as old as Chico.
*slow claps* I had my fingers crossed for Betty, no lie. :)
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