MTaur

MTaur
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Saturday, November 9, 2013

DimOnion: Modern Times update - Flavor text

As a general writing guide, I'm not so sure that I really should be using Donald X. Vaccarino as a reference point, but in this case, it's thoroughly justified. See the previous post or jump straight to the full-resolution card set image on DeviantArt for context.

Here's the new flavor text:

You have to spend money to make money, they say. Preferably, someone else's money, or money that you don't have yet. Or maybe the only way to pay off a debt is to go into debt. Or was it the only way to make money is to go into debt so you can spend money to make money for collateral to go into debt to make money?

The quaint aphorisms of ages past just can't keep up with the complexities of modern times, it seems. To get ahead, you will need to leverage every asset, win every sporting event, ride every wave, and escape on a golden parachute on an inside tip. You might even gerrymander your apartment if it'll put you one step ahead of the next guy.

You come from a very long line of shrewd rulers, after all. And just like in ages past, ingrates flood the streets, only this time, instead of pitchforks they wield cardboard signs and iPhones, which they use to Tweet and Facebook their petty grievances.They have iPhones and they're complaining! Those ingrates! You're sure they would make a U.N. resolution against job creators if they could, but luckily, your man's on the inside and not theirs. To hell with them. If they won't work for minimum wage, someone in another hemisphere will for half that, hopefully less. Health Insurance? Over... someone's dead body, preferably theirs.

You could buy up every foreclosed house in town, and that may make you content for a while, but there are bigger fish to fry. And to fry fish, you need oil. Not vegetable oil - no, what you need is sweet, succulent petroleum, mother's milk, honey of the gods, ambrosia, aqua vitae, dino juice, Arabian gold, Tehran Tea... it has many names, but with any luck, it will serve only one master: you.

Those oil fields might only last another 10-20 years, but that's half a lifetime from now and you're pushing 50. They say the meek will inherit the Earth (or what's left of it), but that's not your problem. Live it up while the living's good, chief executive. These modern times move fast.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

DimOnion - Modern Times

You have to spend money to make money, they say. Preferably, someone else's money, or money that you don't have yet. Or maybe the only way to pay off a debt is to go into debt. Or was it the only way to make money is to go into debt so you can spend money to make money for collateral to go into debt to make money?

The quaint aphorisms of ages past just can't keep up with the complexities of modern times, it seems. To get ahead, you will need to leverage every asset, win every sporting event, ride every wave, and escape on a golden parachute on an inside tip. You might even gerrymander your apartment if it'll put you one step ahead of the next guy.

You come from a very long line of shrewd rulers, after all. And just like in ages past, ingrates flood the streets, only this time, instead of pitchforks they wield cardboard signs and iPhones, which they use to Tweet and Facebook their petty grievances.They have iPhones and they're complaining! Those ingrates! You're sure they would make a U.N. resolution against job creators if they could, but luckily, your man's on the inside and not theirs. To hell with them. If they won't work for minimum wage, someone in another hemisphere will for half that, hopefully less. Health Insurance? Over... someone's dead body, preferably theirs.

You could buy up every foreclosed house in town, and that may make you content for a while, but there are bigger fish to fry. And to fry fish, you need oil. Not vegetable oil - no, what you need is sweet, succulent petroleum, mother's milk, honey of the gods, ambrosia, aqua vitae, dino juice, Arabian gold, Tehran Tea... it has many names, but with any luck, it will serve only one master: you.

Those oil fields might only last another 10-20 years, but that's half a lifetime from now and you're pushing 50. They say meek may inherit the Earth (or what's left of it), but that's not your problem. Live it up while the living's good, chief executive. These modern times move fast.

(Cross-posted at the Dominion strategy forum.)

Yes, I'm at it again. Another fan set for Dominion, this currently quite oversized at 33 cards.


Be sure to look at the full resolution image at http://mtaur.deviantart.com/art/Modern-Times-412030527. Even if you enlarge the image above, you won't be able to read the fine print on a lot of them.

Oil Field is probably game-breakingly snowballerrific. Debt might be a horribly volatile mechanic, but I have some hope that it can be reined in. Amazon + The Consolidator may be the strongest combo on the board, depending on what else you've got throwing Debts at you. For those of you not looking to rack up Dept, perhaps get a Gas Station or three, some extra buys, and a lot of basic Treasures.

I hope to play test this soon. It will likely need tweaks large and small.